bj's gay porno-crazed ramblings

Monday, December 12, 2005
'Cause I never had too much money And I never been quite satisfied


I think the most surprising thing to me about the film Brokeback Mountain is how much it's still on my mind 2 days later. I heard it was good, I knew it would be sad, I was sure I'd cry - all three are very very true. I was supsicious of the "it's more than just a gay story" (yeah, yeah, love IS universal; but I was glad to not have to do the usual translation from the str8 folks on the screen to my own same-sex feelings and experiences) stuff that the film's publicity machine was shoveling out (I know they have to do that, they gotta get people IN the theatres to get them to enjoy it). I think I was caught off guard in that it was much more than a love story, but more of a life story; and so deeply deeply sad - and it has made me so introspective the past 2 days I could scream. Which is fine, I guess. I mean, it's amazing, but kinda scarey and difficult to have all this stuff swirling around in your head. Maybe I was already going in that direction and the film just pushed me over the edge into "why is my life like this?" territory..... Then, last night, I just had to find one of the great tracks from the film's soundtrack - He Was a Friend of Mine - and surprise surprise, my eyes get all heavy and full and wet each time it plays. You'd think I'd stop playing it then, eh?