bj's gay porno-crazed ramblings

Wednesday, January 26, 2005
my own snoring just woke me up
Tried waking up early (11am), but have since then had two naps. I'm doing the hibernating thing all wrong. Sleeping only after 3 or 4am - and going out and drinking too much at night, then sleeping well into the afternoon just - well, it just isn't er, um, very satisfying. Last night I was hoping to bump into this guy I had met out last week. And within minutes of walking into the bar, while waiting to get my beer, he walks up, puts two empty beer cans on the bar near me, we say hi, he says my name, congratulates himself for remembering, (we both smile, and his face is even handsomer than I remembered) then I do a hemna hemna hemna what-do-I-say-now thing. I had noticed him when I walked in the door, chatting with a couple of friends. The bartender gives me a beer, takes my money, takes this guy's order, and all I can manage is "well, looks like you're not leaving...." and he adds "naw, so I will no doubt talk to you again." I retreat into the crowd, he (presumably) goes back to his pals, and we don't talk for the rest of the night.

I'm not going to bother with a play-by-play, it would only be too painful. Much later I did manage to run into a bar buddy, he introduced me to a friend of his, the 3 of us are talking, and I can see, in the distance, my most recent love-interest (is that the right word? I don't LOVE him - yet - but I am INTERESTED in loving him, or making... OK, you get the idea...) looking great, and his body language is telling me that he is about to score with the guy he is now chatting up. RATS! Meanwhile, these guys are talking about one more beer at another bar, and I am anxious to leave. Whenever I see someone I'd like to go home with getting ready to go home with someone else, I really can't stand watching. But, of course I do watch, and the only way to avoid that, and the creepy feelings in my gut, is to get the hell out of there first. My friend's friend sees that our mutual friend isn't ready to leave, I am zipping up and putting my hat on, and he volunteers to leave with me. PHEWWW! At least I don't have the picture in my head of my new man walking out the door with the other man.

I think I am ready for my next nap.