Monday, February 28, 2005


So, my half naked body is only fetching 99 cents. And I haven't had "real sex" ("real" meaning one or both guys actually ejaculate) in probably a month. I should be depressed, but I'm not. What's with that?

The last two times I had a man in my bed, I was very very drunk. And I am useless when I am drunk (unless you like a warm, fuzzy body against you, faux thrusting his crotch into your backside). But, alas, both men were sweet, and there was just something so nice about being comfortable enough not to worry about performance, and just enjoy acting a little silly in bed, snuggling and kissing, and soon enough, snoring. And I've also met a few new guys, and while it's mostly out-in-the-bars stuff, there seems to be genuine affection and friendships developing, and I can't tell you how nice that is. Sex is easy; friendship isn't. While I will no doubt get bummed out real soon about the no-boyfriend-on-the-horizon thing; lately, when it starts to creep up on me, I manage to think about someone who made me laugh so hard I cried, or someone who I somehow managed to bring out a sweet, warm smile. And I forget to get bummed out.