Monday, August 26, 2002

rejection from a straight boy
He seemed nice. I was rather surprised that hours after he left, I kept thinking, "he's the one, he's the one" It was quite puzzling, and I tried my best to think through all the "downsides" - what if he has a bunch of crazy guy friends; egad if he ever got a girlfriend, could I deal with that? will I still be comfy in having my "casual friends" over? And then I had to think why, why did he seem like the one? Was it just because he fixed my monitor's screen display and seemed to know a bit about gadgets and computers? Was it the novelty factor - ooh look, I have a str8 boy!!? But after relaxing for awhile, I started to comparre him to the others, and he just seemed to fit. He was very comfy in the apartment, exploring, poking around, fixing the computer, checking out the view and then settling in the kitchen to talk about all the roommate stuff. And yes, something about his eyes said "please, I want a good home, can't you please help me?"

So I made the call, he picked up immediately, but sounded funny once I identified myself. "Not enough light, kinda small, I hate looking for a place with strangers...... can I get back to you in 6 hours?" I agreed, and by the time I got home from work, there it was, that red flashing light on the answering machine, rejection.